Photograph credit: Unknown

Crucible: (n) 1. a severe test 2. a place or situation in which concentrated forces interact to cause or influence change or development 3. a vessel of a very refractory material (such as porcelain) used for melting and calcining a substance that requires a high degree of heat. (Merriam-Webster Definition)

Art, in all its forms, is such a fleeting thing. 

We create art, and then it seemingly creates us; we become in the crucible of our art. What does it create in us and what do we become?

These are questions and feelings that came up for me performing alongside a talented cast of actors in my first play entitled The Crucible, directed by Paul Spence, based on Arthur Miller’s play entitled The Crucible that was written in 1953 about the Salem Witch Trials during 1692 in Salem Village, Massachusetts. 

There was something really special about this play and about being a part of a like-minded group of people all with a love for drama and theatre, ultimately love for art and the process of creating something (or maybe this is just the ramblings of a first-timer, with the shine of novelty).

Each cast member moved as if painting their character into life; each character created and conveyed a feeling picked up by the audience. 

Art, in any form, does not just move in the creator/performer, it also reaches its creation-filled tentacles out to the audience/onlookers and pulls them in. I found myself pulled and weaved in and out of being both the performer and the onlooker. 

I wished this play would never end; it was so much fun. I felt a deep sense of connection with a part of myself that naturally yearns to create. Have you ever felt this way in your life?  

I wondered how I would feel when it was all over, I skipped a few steps into the future, anticipated sadness, loss, and briefly forgot to be present within the rich moment I had in front of me. 

Sometimes the fear of loss or endings – we know are coming – pulls us out of the present moment, which is where we have nothing to ‘lose’ (if that makes sense?).  So, why do we play in a barren future playground like this when we have a present playground full of magic? 

I got attached, I wanted to stay within this creation and live there and feed off it and let my whole being be transformed by it, but reality waited when the last stage light dimmed to darkness – it reminded me that the show can’t go on. As attached as I felt, I knew I couldn’t make it last forever; the show will go on in all our memories.  

Art, in all its forms, is such a fleeting thing. 

Like life. 

A moment can be so special that we forget everything else and want to be in it forever, but I wonder about this part of me (and maybe all of us?) that want to hold on to something and make it last? Is it just a human tendency? Do we fear change or loss? Do we perceive something beautiful and significant to us as a loss once it’s over? Do we get attached to the idea of losing something more than the actual loss of the thing we hold dear? 

This play stoked the fires of creation within; a stage of expression and fiery emotions burned and formed the pathways of transformation. What transformation comes with creating something? I suppose that is something deep within each of us that only we will know for ourselves. Maybe we will always leave a part of ourselves with our creations and we yearn to go back to reclaim it or rediscover it in something new. 

Always in the crucible of our art.

https://www.facebook.com/schlesingertheatre/

P.S. If you enjoy going to the theatre have a look at the Schlesinger Theatre at Michaelhouse School, in the Midlands of KwaZulu-Natal, for more upcoming performances.

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